Cities and suburbs, real and imaginary.

Thursday, March 8, 2007


i drank a german soda, made with malz, popular and in every local restaurant.

it is absolutely disgusting. it tastes like carbonated molasses. it is unhealthy, unappealing, and definitely undelicious. it seems to have no redeeming qualities whatsoever. the only good thing about it is that i didn't get horribly ill after drinking all .5 liters of the bottle.

as a drank this oddly disgusting beverage, i translated the back label:

"Be Active with Karamalz

Your holding the drink that naturally gives your body and soul energy. Refresh yourself with Karamalz, the alcohol-free fitness beverage - ideal for sport, fun, and freetime.

Tastes best when cold."

The main ingredients for this - apparently - sport drink include water, malt, high fructose corn syrup, and hops.

after drinking this sport drink, not only was i disgusted, but i put the big, glass bottle aside, and fell asleep way too early.

in summary: every single thing about this beverage is a lie. just drink beer. the beer probably is healthier because the alcohol is less scary than weird corn syrups.

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