Cities and suburbs, real and imaginary.

Monday, September 1, 2008

end of summer?

in texas, summer doesn't end until halloween. we have three seasons.
1) Wet Season from Halloween through February.
2) Nice Season from March through June.
3) Really Fucking Hot from July to October.


Why do we all structure our calenders and years around New England and Europe's seasonal mutations?

They make no sense to me.

If Texas Schools wanted a schedule that reflected the reality of our urban/suburban lives instead of some false flirtation with hands at the harvest time, I say make our summer vacations July, August, and September. The schools would save a fortune on air conditioning, the kids would have the long summer days to run in the heat and make their memories and we'd never have to cancel schools for a hurricane again(happened to me twice in Houston. No snow days. Tropical Storm and Hurricane Days but no snow days.)

Someday the Texas Legislature will listen to me. Some fine day. I hereby proclaim my candidacy for Evil Overlord of All Texas! Tear up the constitution, and by wide acclaim thrust me into the office of Evil Overlord! I promise to change our school calenders to reflect our climate needs. I also promise to build a palace the size of Byzantium and populate it with loyal trained monkeys that cater to every whim of my chosen few. I will build an army of baboon/human hybrids. Together we will conquer New Mexico! We will conquer Louisiana! (We won't conquer Oklahoma. Who would want Oklahoma? Not me. Blech.)

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